And in my mental haze and morbitity….

This morning opened my mind further, that It is time to try to pull myself up out of the pit that I have curled up in and covered myself over with. That this down must start going back up. Kobash let me know in no uncertain terms that I had been negligent as to his continued training. He demonstrated this publicly of course, and in a place that we are known. Sigh, thanks for that Kobash.
It occurred to me in my embarrassment, that I had had a glimpse of it last week while the family and I were out and about on the field, doing spiritual things and talking to people. We had stopped to talk to a lovely lady, her and her children comely in appearance and manners. They and their house almost like they were straight out of a Laura Ashley catalogue, complete with beautiful Dalmatian Dog.
Now while Kobash has been exposed to hyper dogs while were out before, he hasn’t been exposed to hyper dogs that the AsperBoy was playing with. A great distraction for him, as this is his boy, and is the one that plays with him! He lay in his “down” that I had him in, body ridged, bat ears at full attention, eyes so firmly focused on the Dalmatian that they almost fell out of his head. His tail was lashing back ad forth over the un-mowed grass he was lying in so hard, that it could have been a cyclone sweeping past. The Dalmatian jumped up to put his paws on the top of the white metal gate he was standing behind, to get a better view of my boy. All the easier to lick his face from that position. That was too much for Kobash. He was up and trying to get to that dog, excitement at its peak. No aggression from Kobash. No, not from him. Not from this Dog of mine that runs from a confrontation like he is trying to get the other Dog to play chasings with him. Kobash wanted to play. And play now! The lady of the house thought this was all great fun, the kids laughed, AsperBoy laughed. I wasn’t laughing. Slightly embarrassed, I nervously giggled. Kobash settled down enough for me to get him back into a down. I took this as a lesson. I thought I had exposed him to enough situations like this. But I hadn’t exposed him to ones involving my Boy and other Dogs.

But today……

At the café, waiting for our coffees, AsperBoy off merrily with his dad to do Boy things like fish, and roll in the dirt. There weer two other Dogs there with their owners. A calm spaniel laying down next to her owners table while she was sipping her late’ and reading her paper. The other, a very young Border Collie. I think we can all guess which one Kobash was interested more in. Now again, in this situation, Kobash would stay by me. He would be very alert to other dogs, head swivelling around on his neck in a way a cockatoo would envy. But stay by me he would. Today made me all to aware that my days of self absorbment, and morbidity, needed to come to an end. I usually give Kobash “being a Dog time”. Time to be a Dog with other Dogs doing Dog things. But what about Nova? Nova the beauteous, Nova the spoilt, Nova the constant slumberer on 2 seater couches all to herself, slender legs occasionally twitching in dreams of chasing…..what? Not cats. She’s scared of cats.

Nova is a known Dog. She is also a Dog who wont play. She will still do her afternoon mad run around the back yard, reaching top speeds, faster than a speeding superman. But she doesn’t like rough play. And Kobash does. So I try to give him time with Dogs that can match him in his play. But I haven’t done that in a quiet a while. Its been an effort to get myself up and out. Even for a walk. Too much back pain, neck pain, pins and needles, having to do heart journals, tests tests tests and more tests. Stress from life, sensory overloads going beyond critical mass. It was all I have been able to do, just to drag myself out of a bed that I cant sleep in anyway. So Kobash’s  Doggy play time has sadly been neglected. And he let me know this this morning, while for the black brain kicking in to gear stuff that helps with the walking and the talking and the putting into sentence doing. Thanks Lorelai Gilmore.

Kobash was at full attention. Watching the young Border Collie. He is still when another Dog is still. If it was just the spaniel there, he wouldn’t haven’t even noticed it laying there calmly and quietly. But the pup was up and down. Sitting standing. Kobash was getting more and more excited. Then a German Shepherd joined the mix. And Kobash’s head didn’t know which way to turn. You could almost hear him saying, “If ONLY I had eyes in the back of my head!” It was too much again for him. And he did his I wana play dance.

Inside my head the light bulb went off, and I went “OHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!” while my face was going red. Kobash has made me all too cognizant of my need to focus more on him and our working together. Made me aware that there is always more to learn. Even as far as we have come together. There is always more to discover. That is why I picked his breed. Why I chose him. Its important for  service Dogs to be properly matched with someone. Kobash matches me in that we both love to learn new things, and our brains are always going. We don’t set each other off like some would think. He makes me more alert to what is going on around me through his actions. He lets me know when I’ve become too overloaded sensorily that I don’t know situations that I’ve gotten myself into that would bring on melt downs. He teaches me so much about myself.


Intense focus Heeler style? Nailed it.





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